(Girl Somebody’s Been Askin’ After Your) Potato Salad – Southwestern Style

STORY

Some years ago, when I was an undergrad, I met a man because of potato salad. We were at one of those end-of-the-year picnics that colleges routinely sponsor (Yay, free food!), but the food was mediocre (Boo, food services!) and he was there, standing in line behind me, expressing excitement over the potato salad.

“Potato salad!” He said. “I just love potato salad. Don’t you?”

I paused, looked at the glutenous blob of mayonnaise and potato that sat before me and I answered, “I do, but since I moved to New York, I haven’t had any decent potato salad.” (And I still haven’t. No offense, New Yorkers, but Southerners do this better… and fried chicken, too.)

“Tell me about it,” The-guy-in-the-line said, “I’m from the the Southwest, and they make kick-ass potato salad there. It’s really hard to get good potato salad up here.”

“Really,” I leaned toward him, smiled coyly, and cocked my head to the side. “I make great potato salad.”

The-guy-in-the-line piped up immediately, “You do?! Well we’re going to have to have a picnic in Central Park. I’ll make something…” and on and on he went as I chuckled quietly to myself. I had seduced him with the mere thought of my potato salad. I was a seduction pro!

Still duty called, and I had to run off to math class (a disastrous class full of misfit artists, former performers, and one lady who hadn’t taken a math class since the 1950s.). We promised to meet up after class, but The-guy-in-the-line wasn’t there when I returned. My heart sank. I was certain I’d never see him again.

A mere week later, I ran into a friend (one of my fellow misfits from Math class), who as fate would have it wasThe-guy-in-the-line’s friend, too. When he spotted me, he waved me down, and rolled over in his desk chair. Breathless, he grabbed my arm enthusiastically said, “Gurrl, somebody’s been askin’ after your potato salad!”

My fellow misfit promised that he would arrange a meet-and-greet picnic which we both would attend, but The-guy-in-the-line and I found each other before then, and we began a courtship in which I prepared him my potato salad adjusted to reflect his southwestern roots. Fortunately the recipe survived the demise of the relationship (we so didn’t suit), and though I can’t promise this recipe will land you a spouse like Rachael Ray’sYou Won’t Stay Single For Long Vodka Cream Pasta, I can guarantee you a dish that folks will be praising years after they’ve eaten it.

Tip: This recipe serves about 4 people. If you want to make it just for yourself, half the measurements.

RECIPE

• Prep Time: 10 – 15 minutes
• Cook Time: 10 – 15 minutes
• Inactive Time: 2-8 hours
• Total Time: 2 ½ hours – 8 ½ hours

TOOLS

• 8-inch chef’s knife
• 8-quart stockpot
• 1 colander
• 1 small mixing bowl
• 1 medium sized mixing bowl (for ice bath, and for mixing potato salad)
• 1 wooden spoon

INGREDIENTS

1 lb of bliss potatoes

1 lb of purple majesty potatoes (if you can’t find them, use bliss potatoes)

1 tbsp of sea salt (for boiling)

¼ cup chopped celery

¼ cup onion, chopped

½ cup good mayonnaise (I use Hellman’s)

2 tbsp buttermilk (if you don’t have buttermilk, use apple cider vinegar)

2 tbsp whole-grain mustard

½ cup chopped fresh cilantro

½ tbsp of cumin seeds

1 tsp of sea salt

1 tsp of freshly ground black pepper

METHOD

1. Fill a stockpot ¾ full with water, 1 tbsp of salt, and 1 lb of bliss and 1 lb of purple majesty potatoes  (whole not cut), and bring to a rapid boil over medium-high heat.
2. While potatoes are being brought to a boil, mix together 2 tbsp of buttermilk (or apple cider vinegar), ½ cup of good mayonnaise, 2 tbsp of whole grain mustard,½ cup chopped fresh cilantro, ½ tbsp of cumin seeds, and 1 teaspoon of salt, and 1 teaspoon of pepper in a small mixing bowl and set aside.
3. Once dressing is mixed, chop ¼ cup of celery, and ¼ cup of onion and set aside.
4. When potatoes are boiling for about a minute, lower the heat to a simmer for an additional 10-15 minutes, until the potatoes are firm but tender (check potatoes by piercing one with a knife or a bamboo skewer).
5. Using a colander, drain the potatoes, and place in a bowl filled with ice water.
6. When potatoes are cool, use colander to drain potatoes out of the ice bath.
7. Once potatoes are drained, cut potatoes into into quarters, keeping skin intact and place back into mixing bowl.
8. Add the chopped celery and onions, the dressing and 1 tsp of salt and 1 tsp of pepper to the bowl of potatoes, and mix ingredients well.
9. Place plastic wrap over the bowl and refrigerate for 2 – 8 hours (the longer the better).
10. Go out and seduce people with your potato salad.

(Photo Credit: Matthew G. Piccolo)